


Shooting (Right For Your Heart)

by Anonymous



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, M/M, SO MUCH BANTER, like this fic is mostly banter, sort of based on 00Q?, there's a lot of swearing in this lol, this is kinda cracky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-12
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-12-14 09:29:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11780292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Jim is a bad flirt, Spock is sick and tired of his antics.





	Shooting (Right For Your Heart)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much to my dear dear patron and friend, Dani. I really hope you enjoy this fic. I didn't get the chance to expand upon this fic nearly as much as I wanted, you asked for 2k and I ended up writing almost 3k. Honestly, I could have written more and paced it better and just done SO MUCH MORE with this a...as it is this is like a little glimpse into it. a 2.8k drabble so to speak. Thank you for being so patient! And thank you so so much for helping me out, I can't repay you enough, I hope this fic at least covers half of what I owe you in karmic debt lol, I love you.
> 
> I haven't written Spirk since 2015...yeah...it's been a while. I hope I still have their characterization down though. 
> 
> Try to catch all the little references to the star trek universe and its cast lol.

“Jim, take the alley at your six,” Spock said calmly.

Jim jerked his car roughly to the right almost driving over an innocent fire hydrant in the process.

“Jim, that was not your six,” Spock reprimanded in the same unimpressed tone he seemed to always possess. The man was infuriatingly composed.

“I'm sorry, Spock. It's not like I have a clock face tattooed behind my eyelids,” Jim snapped. He could see the car he was speeding away from gaining on him and he briefly entertained the idea of ditching the car and trying his luck on foot.

“If you are thinking of ditching the car, don't,” Spock warned. He had a freaky ability to know when Jim was planning to do something stupid. “There's a light up ahead, get on the ramp.”

Jim could see the light, it was yellow- he sped past it.

Usually, Jim followed basic traffic laws (even if he looked at speed limits as more of speed suggestions) but he figured this time he could be forgiven for flooring it. After all, it wasn't an everyday occurrence for him to be chased out of a Russian diplomat's house for stealing valuable classified information. Actually, scratch that- being chased out of places for stealing valuable information _was_ an everyday occurrence. The Russians were a new addition though. He’d had suspicions that Pavel Chekov had ties to the Russian mafia, and this high speed chase around a semi residential area confirmed them.

“The ramp. Okay, then what?” Jim asked Spock, swerving to avoid an old lady and a little girl- probably her granddaughter.

“There's moderate traffic and no road lights,” Spock said simply. “Lose them.”

Jim got on the ramp quickly, the Russians hot in his trail.

“Christ, these people just don't give up!”

“You _did_ steal Russia’s nuclear codes, Jim.”

Jim rolled his eyes at Spock’s know-it-all tone. “Whatever. I need some mood music, this is killing me. Did you say this car was Bluetooth enabled?”

He could almost picture Spock nod his head, his awful bowl cut not even ruffling a minuscule bit at the movement. “As per your request.”

“Sweet!” Jim whooped. “You see Spock, this is why I love you.”

“You shouldn't say things you don't mean,” Spock reprimanded.

“Who says I don't mean it?” Jim joked, even though it wasn't really much of a joke. At least not to him. “Hey Siri, play some beastie boys.”

“Now playing Beastie Boys, Sabotage,” came the robotic voice of his car.

“Nice,” Jim muttered to himself before turning his attention back to the chase.

“God who the hell is driving that car!” Jim complained as he drove past the sedan currently going at 20mph in a 50mph highway. He glanced at the driver once he managed to pass them. Of course, it was an old man.

“I'm surprised they haven't started shooting at you,” Spock said conversationally.

Jim glared at the road in front of him as if it were Spock.

“Don't jinx it.”

“Your car is mostly bulletproof. It's safer than a military tank,” Spock said matter-of-factly.

“There's bystanders,” the traffic was mild for a Saturday night, but still- there was traffic. He wasn't about to endanger other people’s lives.

Jim pressed down on the gas, switching lanes in rapid succession in an effort to lose his tail. He wasn't very successful. Even after five minutes of speeding, his stalkers were practically bumper to bumper with him.

“You gotta give me alternatives here Spock, I can't lose them,” Jim admitted.

Spock was quiet for a moment, “you can shoot their tires from that distance.”

“Something that doesn't involve opening fire,” Jim said and then what Spock said registered. “Are you watching me?”

“I'm always watching you, Jim.”

“Yeah, God. Like that's not totally disturbing.”

Jim didn't bother asking where the cameras were, he probably didn't want to know.

“If you don't want to open fire then your only alternative is to keep driving,” Spock said, deliberately ignoring Jim’s previous comment.

“Keep driving huh?” Jim’s brain was always orchestrating something but this time he made an active effort to make sure it was something good.

Spock was right when he said that Jim didn't have many options. Going at ninety miles per hour on a straight stretch of road could only get you so far.

“I don't appreciate your radio silence,” Spock said, and had it been someone who actually used inflections in their speech it might have come across as him being suspicious. As it was, he said it in the same flat tone one would say “the sky is cloudy tonight” when trying to make conversation with a stranger in an elevator.

“Don't worry, I've got it all under control,” Jim reassured.

“That _is_ worrisome,” Spock responded. Jim could just see the skeptical eyebrow.

“Have a little faith in me, Spock,” Jim smirked. “When have I ever failed a mission?”

“Well-”

“Don't answer that,” Jim didn't fail missions very often but when he did fail them the consequences were disastrous. Such was the life of a high ranking spy.

Jim looked through his rearview mirror just in time to see one of the russians pull out a gun.

“Damn it, Spock,” Jim groaned. “You jinxed it.”

“I'm surprised it took them this long to be honest,” Spock said.

Jim was not amused.

The first shot rang loud and clear, Jim heard it even with the sound of Beastie Boys blasting inside the car.

“SHIT!”

“The car is fine, why are you yelling?” Spock sounded perplexed.

“Did you put sensors on the car?” Jim asked incredulously.

“Of course,” Spock said just as a bullet ingrained itself on the driver's side mirror. “You've sustained a hit.”

“Yes I can see that Spock. Thank you for the running commentary,” Jim said sarcastically. He swerved violently to the right, throwing a silent apology to the lady he cut off.

“I think they've called reinforcements Jim,” Spock informed. Jim swore he could hear a trickle of worry sneaking into his voice.

“What?”

“There's a van on your left-” Spock was cut off as said van slammed hard onto Jim’s passenger side. The car lurched and Jim honestly feared it turning over.

“Fuck!” Jim yelled slamming his fist into the wheel, he pressed harder on the gas, hoping to put as much distance as possible between him and his pursuers.

“Are you alright?” Spock asked, calm facade abandoned for clear concern.

“I'm fine,” Jim said in between grit teeth. “That bastard rammed into me.”

“I noticed,” was Spock's simple reply. “That car cost more money than your life is worth, please be more careful from now on.”

“Oh hey Jim, are you hurt?” Jim asked himself.

“No, Spock. I'm not hurt thank you for asking!”

Jim continued talking even as he reached for the gun holstered by his armpit, he didn't want it to come to this but it was unavoidable. “Oh I'm glad to hear that Jim! I was actually worried about your safety and well being for a minute there.”

“Oh Spock, you shouldn't have been,”Jim put on a cheerful affectation, lowering the passenger side window and taking the safety on his gun off.

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“Actually Jim, if you survive this I would love to take your sweet ass to dinner sometime,” Jim continued ignoring Spock completely. He would have liked to aim at the other cars tires but he couldn't see them from his current angle, so instead he aimed for the windows and prayed the Russians weren't cheap enough to forgo bulletproof glass. That would be messy.

“I don't talk like that,” Spock said, Jim couldn’t see him but he could hear the frown in his voice. He could imagine it too- the corners of Spock’s lips turned down slightly in distaste. He made that face often when he was around Jim.

“It's a joke Spock, did they not teach you that in Hebrew School?” Jim pulled the trigger. The glass was bulletproof. _Thank god_. The bullet bounced onto the pavement, luckily not ricocheting back to Jim somehow.

“Are you implying Jewish people don't have a sense of humor?” Spock asked, obviously confused with the turn the conversation had taken.

The Russians pulled back a little now that they had seen he had a gun, just as he was hoping they would do. He knew that was momentary though, they were probably pulling back to strategize.

“That's not what I said!”

“That's exactly what you said.”

Jim paused for a second and then he groaned. “Dammit, you’re right I did imply that. Shit, sorry Spock. It's not Jewish people it's just you.”

“Thanks for the clarification?” Spock never rolled his eyes. At least, not anywhere Jim would catch him, but his comment sounded so exasperated that it might as well be the verbal version of an eye roll.

“Find me somewhere crowded so I can get lost,” Jim told Spock after the Russians seemed to get their act together and began shooting at Jim’s car. The bullets sounded like pebbles when they made contact.

“You aren't ditching the car,” Spock said flatly. “I told you, you couldn't ditch the car.”

“Find me a place to get lost or I will try my luck and chose at random,” Jim said simply.

Spock sighed. “You can take exit 71B it's half a mile up. There's a wine and food festival near by. It's closing up but there should be some stragglers that can provide cover.”

“Thank you!” Jim chirped. He leaned over the driver’s side window, aiming at the front tires of the car following (way too closely) behind him. It was an uncomfortable position, his back bent awkwardly so his foot could stay on the pedal. However, his aim proved true and he busted the suv’s driver side tire.

“I'm amazing,” Jim praised himself once he was back inside the car.

“You're a narcissist,” Spock said without missing a beat. “The exit is up ahead, you got rid of one car but there's still a van full of angry Russians chasing after you. Try to shake them off.”

“What do you think I've been doing? Going for a relaxing weekend drive?”

Jim had grown desensitized to the sound of bullets bouncing off the trunk.

“I'm almost scared to know the extent of your power,” Jim started, only half jokingly. “But can you tell me how many people are inside that van?”

“Give me one moment,” Spock said.

Through his earpiece Jim could hear the click clack of a computer keyboard along with Spock’s soft breathing.

“There are eight people inside the van. There also seems to be some artillery, I can’t really tell you what it is, just that they are sitting on what appears to be boxes. I'm assuming it's minor explosives and maybe some machine weapons.”

“They have explosives in the car?” Jim asked apprehensively. He shouldn't have been shooting at them. He’d known opening fire was a bad idea.

“I can't tell just by looking. I am merely making a deduction.”

“Your deductions are usually spot on Spock,” Jim frowned. He didn't know what kind of drone camera Spock was using to get his information, but he was sure he was better off without a clue.

Jim made a quick lane switch when he saw the sign for his exit up ahead. He could hear the person he sped past yell ‘asshole’ through their open window.

“I'm on my way, call me an uber and have them wait for me at the festival,” Jim told Spock before making the executive decision to fling his earpiece out the window.

Spock would be upset with him, but Jim would deal with that when the need arose.

He'd left Spock in the dark before, actually it was a habit of his. Spock asked for it though. Jim had never met anyone as naggy and bossy as Spock. “This is a bad idea Jim,” and “I wouldn't suggest that,” were the only words that came out of Spock's mouth whenever he was in charge of one of Jim’s missions. Jim had an issue with authority, he didn't appreciate being told what to do. Even if Spock was just trying to keep him alive most of the time.

Anyway, Jim thought Spock was just being dramatic underneath all that ‘detached impassiveness’. Things always worked in Jim’s favor.

At least that's what he told himself.

Spock tended to disagree.

—

“You imbecile,” was the first thing Spock said when Jim rolled in nearly two hours later with a busted lip and what was probably a hairline fracture in one of his knuckles. Spock’s eyes trailed over Jim’s ripped button up, clearly unimpressed.

“Ha,” Jim smiled, wrinkling his nose when it made his split lip stretch painfully. “Nice to see you too Spock.”

“Why do you always do this?” Spock had an impressive glare, resting bitch face not included.

Jim shrugged nonchalantly in response.

“You parked the car in an illegal parking zone,” Spock said conversationally. “It got towed.”

“Ah...sorry.”

“That car cost a hundred million euros,” Spock said flatly. “ _Euros_ Jim. Not dollars.”

“Yeah I heard you the first time.”

“You got a multi million dollar car towed,” Spock didn't even sound mad honestly, just sick and tired of Jim’s shit.

“Do you want a handwritten apology?” Jim raised his eyebrow.

“You’ll pay to get it back.”

“Sure.”

Spock watched as Jim clutched at his side, poorly hidden worry clouding his expression. “Are you hurt?”

“What gave it away?” Jim asked rhetorically.

“The bleeding lip,” Spock answered. Sometimes Jim forgot that Spock was the most straight forward person on the western coast of the United States.

“Yeah well,” Jim shrugged with one shoulder. “You try fighting eight guys at once.”

Spock frowned, his bushy eyebrows furrowing deeply, “I'll speak to the higher ups and have you put in mandatory leave.”

“What?” Jim protested. “You can't!”

“I can and I will,” Spock said in a tone that offered no space for argument.

“Why?” Jim glared, trying and failing to keep his voice down. “I'm the best agent in the field.”

“Because,” Spock said in a low frustrated voice. “I'm your handler and you are of no use to me while injured.”

“These injuries are superficial, they don't require-”

“No, Jim,” Spock held up a hand in finality.

“You can't do this.”

“I thought we established I can,” Spock said. _Smart ass_.

“But-”

“Plus, what use do I have for an agent that continuously ignores my directives and-”

“Why do you care?” Jim exclaimed, annoyed and incredulous at Spock's sudden obstinacy. “This isn't new! You knew how I was when I was assigned to you!”

“Things have changed now,” Spock said sharply.

“How?” Jim was practically yelling in protest now.

“I-” Spock stopped himself. He looked green under the fluorescent lights of his office. Nauseous.

Jim scoffed in frustration. “You can't even admit it can you?”

“You don't know what you are talking about.”

“Don't I?” Jim rolled his eyes. He was beyond frustrated.

“Stop it, you are changing the subject,” Spock shook his head.

“No, I'm addressing your obvious inability to differentiate business from-”

“Why do you insist on making this into something it's not?” Spock snapped, finally losing his composure.

“Oh, it _emotes_ ,” Jim said sarcastically.

“So what?” Spock said, clearly bothered. “So what if I have feelings for you? That doesn't get in the way of me making logical decisions!”

Jim blinked, “you…”

“I know it's not reciprocated, it's not a big deal, it has never clouded my judgement before,” Spock said quietly.

“Who said it wasn't reciprocated?” Jim stared at Spock with wide eyes.

“What?” Spock seemed to deflate in front of Jim’s eyes.

“I never thought you’d admit it…I had almost given up,” Jim said quietly.

“What do you mean?” Spock asked. Even though he was obviously trying to hide it, he sounded hopeful.

“I love you,” Jim said simply, out of nowhere, as if he had never once thought of labeling his feelings as anything else.

“I-” Spock swallowed thickly and then in a clumsy move that caused Jim’s head to hit the wall. Spock was pushing him against the closest available surface and kissing him passionately.

It was sloppy, messy, and a little bit nervous, but Jim had never tasted lips so sweet.

Spock’s hands were trembling where they held his face, his lips were rough and dry against Jim’s but Jim melted against him like butter.

“You idiot,” Jim whispered against Spock's lips. “How could you ever doubt my feelings for you.”

Spock huffed, a short breath of a laugh that felt cool against Jim’s wet lips. “In my defense you do flirt with anything that walks.”

“That's a gross exaggeration,” Jim rolled his eyes. Spock’s eyes looked affectionate as he pressed his lips against Jim’s using his hips to push him up against the wall.

“Fuck,” Jim hissed. Spock made an inquisitive sound, his lips moving from Jim’s own to his neck.

“As much as I would love to keep doing this,” Jim said in between Spock’s kisses. “I think I bruised a rib while fighting those mafia guys.”

Spock froze, pulling back to stare down at Jim. “Okay, you are definitely going on leave.”

Spock resolutely ignored Jim’s answering whine.

**Author's Note:**

> Because I have gotten so used to writing long fic lately or at least fic that are around 6k words or more this fics execution was not what I wanted it to be. But considering the word limit I was given I did the most I could do. I may come and revisit this universe later when I have the time. maybe add some sort of prequel to make it all more cohesive and make the pacing seem more organic. I think it really all depends on if that is something my patron and readers would like to see. 
> 
> Dani wanted an angry confession scene and wall kissing and Spirk decided to be clumsy wall kissers and "I knew you loved me anyway why u playin'" looking headasses. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> No beta! ☹
> 
> Contact me on: [twitter](https://twitter.com/pristinepristin) | [tumblr ](https://xenobotanist.tumblr.com)
> 
> Want to read my other works? Click [here](http://archiveofourown.org/users/xenobotanist).


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